Ok. I did not see that one coming.

So get this insanity. We are at this rest stop and I see this guy (bandana on his face and shades about my height but with blonde hair sticking out the top) walking up looking towards me. The guy is with a women (a couple inches shorter than me and with almost white colored, short hair, tannish, grey eyes) and they both are walking up and everything starts to play out as if in slow motion. This women walks straight through the door and comes towards me and the guy goes towards the little blonde girl with me. The girl I’m protecting is in the back. This women pulls a knife on me as I see the guy try to throw a punch at the little blonde girl. So this women stabs at me because she is clearly inexperienced with a knife and I counter, break her wrist and take the knife like a champ. It is a little freaking gerber knife so toss it across the floor towards the register. The little blonde girls is in a fight with the guy by now and she looks like she has taken a couple bad hits so I run over to her, jump a table and land a solid straight kick to this dudes head, knocking him out. By this time the women is back with the knife in her left hand and this time she is smarter and tries slashing instead of stabbing but my little blonde friend hits her with a chair. Now luckily this place is in the middle of nowhere so the police are a good 5 minutes away (obviously someone has called them). We drag the guy and girl out back. My little friend is looking somewhat beat up but she is fine for now. The little girl we are protecting runs out back and says some other cars have pulled up out front. “Cops already?” I ask. She says “No, other guys with guns.” So now it’s go time and I brandish my m9 and toss my little blonde friend my Glock. Yes I carry two pistols, I’m a winner. I look through the back window to the front and see three guys with crappy store bought m4’s (I’m talking Dunam’s Sporting Goods). Blondie goes right and I go left. Alex – 2……Blondie – 1

Yea thats right!!

Anyway the two people wake up at gun point and I have a good long talk with the guy.

Get ready for mindblowingness..ness

He’s her dad. Yes the little girl I have been protecting. And the women? Well guess you fools, It’s her mom. So yea I broke her mom’s wrist. Whatever. I didn’t know ok? So the dad works for this guy and the dad pissed off the guy and now he’s gonna kill the guys daughter so the guy hired me and then tried to come kill me and get his daughter but we talked for a really long time and now we are all deciding a couple minutes later to work together against this bad guy. Did you get all of that?

All of a sudden big ass boom. I peak through the wondow from the back of the dinner and see that our car has been blown up. WHAT?! NO! HELL NO!! MY NEW M4 AND MY IPOD WERE IN THERE! FUCK NO!

So there is a van full of retards with Dunam’s sporting goods M4’s out there and we all decide unanimously: Kill them? Yes.

Me and blondie go through the dinner with M9 and Glock and the father goes around the right (more cover) and sneakily grabs one of the first two perps’ M4. The girl and her mom go behind the diner further into a wooded area. We start to gun down these suckers and then we see a guy with an m203. Oh shit. He fires into the dinner and some random object (salt shaker?) hits blondie in the head conveniently and knocks her unconscious. The dad finishes m203 man and I run to blondie. I pick her up because we hear police sirens and I run into the woods with the dad and the mom and the girl I’ve been protecting. As I am carrying this girl I notice a couple of her tattoos.  She has my family crest tattooed on her chest. Just like me. And she has our immediate family’s family tattoo on the back of her neck. What.

Get ready for this because THE THRILLS AND SURPRISES AREN’T OVER YET FOLKS.

She wakes up. I ask her “What is your mother’s name?” She replies “I never met my mother.” “Ok, what was your father’s name?” “I didn’t know my blood father but I was raised by…

Surprise she’s my sister. Sorry about not sharing my family history with you. But yea…I’m not going to.

We are all currently on the road in a new car (stolen) and are about to stop for the night. But I gotta say. Today was awesome. I met my sister. Got in some great action. And this little girl is the daughter of someone I actually know. Me and this guy have had a little competition in the past. He is an amateur hit man and he has family ties to the Russian mob which is why he is having problems. Anyway he kinda sucks at killing people whereas me and my sister are extremely well trained. There the secret is out eh? I figured, fuck it if you all know, more entertainment for you and less thinking about what I’m trying to say. And really It’s no threat to me because hitmen don’t generally blog. I have a pretty extensive friend list of guys who do this for a living and as far as I know…nope none of them have blogs, or anything of the sort. So I’m good to go. But if someone important was to see this…well they still don’t know where I am or anything important so I’m good to go. Also I can tell you that my little sisters name is Lena, this girl I’ve been watching is named Fer and her mom and dad are Fez and Julia. Awesome names right? Well I thought so…

Anyhow now you all know about me. Yes it’s “cool” but the most dangerous lifestyle. Period. I guess you know about two of my tattoos also. Congrats you know so much about me.

I will post again soon because for now everything is pretty calm and we shouldn’t run into much resistance. The dad said that this guy is seeing how much of a waste of resources I and this girl are. Hehe. come at me bro.

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2 thoughts on “Ok. I did not see that one coming.

  1. Holy shit, this is the kind of stuff action movies are made of…and you get to live them! Pretty crazy. Definitely hope that you stay safe though. I totally laughed my head off when I read that the dad really sucks at killing people haha.

    • Trust me, movies make this stuff seem way more serious than it is. We joke around a lot hahaha! Appreciate your concern though, thanks man. Also hope all of your trials and tribulations are going well!

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